In a room with 100 people, I soaked in the words spoken by our ministry leaders who flew me and my colleagues half way across the country for a day of professional and personal development, my mind focused in on those words, divine design.
As I read my notes the day after, I ponder.
Oh how I drift in my life. I drift from idea to idea, from project to project, to commitment-to-commitment, living life. But going back to the D word, drift. I drift in and out of consciousness to the fact that God has a plan for me, little ole me. Drifting is after all my default.
I drift in the regular pulls of life, the responsibilities, the obligations, the stuff I make.
And I quickly forget the memorials of my life that are there to remind me of His design. The memorials—those stones in our lives that mark the miles, the big stuff, the game changers. Those events and sequences that change our paths so that we can do the next thing and to become who God wants us to be. Wait, what? Did I say that?
As I sat in the conference, my mind quickly scanned my life to identify the memorials, reminding me briefly how God’s plan has played out. That stuck.
God has used some incredible memorials to shape my life, to shape me. He prepared me for exactly where I am right now, for who I am right now. If you would have asked me four years ago, where I would be today, ha, let me just pause to say WOW God!
My love for Jesus and growing in Him is most important. What? Oh, you’re teaching me how to love people better, even those who push my hot buttons with inconsideration, rudeness, rejection, and downright hypocritical behavior? Um, huh? You want me to knock on the door of a brothel every other week? Oh God, you’re so funny. You’re going to set my heart on fire for the darkest of dark issues dealing with the sex trade industry and you want me to talk about sex slaves? Sure. You want me to love people who have hurt me in the past? And just to make sure I get that message, you’re going to bring someone back into my life that seemed to be the face of pure evil and now you want me to love them? Oh ok. Ok God. Are you serious? I see what’s happening. Or did I really?
Through this speaker, God gently reminded me of the memorials that have brought me here, right now to this place, this frustrating, beautiful, but challenging and bewildering, sweet place. I know God has a plan for me. In looking at my life’s memorials, I see clearly how God is shaping me into the person he wants me to be.
He has a purpose for me. It’s up to me to own it.
God has not brought me this far to give up or for me to say it’s too hard, or to decide to go another direction.
But I need Him. I can’t go this alone, not for one minute. I need his grace, his mercy, and his forgiveness. I need his encouragement. In the end I want Him to say, well done, good and faithful servant. Day 14 #Write31days